Yesterday I discovered something about myself – mind you I’m not sure that’s the right way to put it! We all know something sweet when you’ve had a shock/fright and if you don’t have it your body almost screams out for it. It is the same with anxiety/stress/fear. Yesterday P. was called by the Docs and they want him to come in to talk about his blood tests. In reality it’s nothing much but that doesn’t stop the imagination taking olympic gold in the long jump and landing at worst case scenario. So for most of yesterday I was in a frenzy of high anxiety with an over whelming longing for something sweet. When it came to my lunch I wasn’t really in the mood for anything but if it had been dipped in chocolate then I’d have taken your hand off. To be honest the thing I really wanted was cream cakes. I was very good and resisted however as it was chinese & chocolate day (delayed by a day luckily) I was able to indulge a bit later on that evening. However still no cream cakes. I think I will have to figure out a sweet breakfast of some sort the day he goes to the docs – fighting the urge in advance ’cause I just know that I’ll need it – emotionally speaking ’cause I don’t think the imagination is right.
Anyway it’s Saturday and I’m still at home so that means I’m going to start the Alli this morning. OMG what am I letting myself in for. I’d better go and get started ’cause I also have to go to the vet to get food for the mogs and I want to be sure of myself before I head out.